Titles for Matthew's Biography of the Last 6 Months

Potential Titles for Matthew's Autobiography:
1) 101 Things to Drum on the Dogs With
Matthew seems to think that everything in the house is either a drumstick or a drum. At the same time he is going through an "agressively affectionate" phase with the dogs. He likes to squeal and then run up to the dogs and pet (more like pound on) the dogs. Although Tony and I think of the scream as a squeal of delight to greet his canine compadres, the dogs think of Matthew's scream as a Croatian battle cry and scatter as soon as he enters the room. The dogs always forgive him by dinnertime, though. Instead of eating the chicken nuggets or cheese, Matthew much prefers to throw his food to the dogs and watch them scurry towards the scraps. He giggles hysterically as he watches them. Note: We make sure he is supervised around the dogs.

2) The Reason I Refuse to Say "Mama", Even Though I have been Saying Daddy for Over Six Months Now.. and the Cute Things I do to Make my Mom Forgive Me

Da da.. means "What's That". Da da means "dog". Da da means "I want that" and Da da means "Da da". Matthew also says "Daddy" when Tony enters the room. However, he refuses to say, "Mama" even though I have heard the MMM sound come out of his mouth. I have even tried getting right in front of his face and said, "Where's Mama?". He stares blankly forward. I will have to have his eyesight checked next time we go to the doctor :) One cute thing he has started to do that makes me forgive him.. he hugs my legs whenever I enter the room.

3) Attack of the Molar Bears
Matthew woke up screaming/crying inconsolably a couple of nights ago. He hasn't done this in several months. I noticed that he had some molars trying to poke through. The poor guy was in pain, but since he only called for "Da Da", I made Tony attend to him at 3AM.

4) The Cabinet Reorganizer
What 16 month old doesn't love to bang on pots and pans? Matthew pulls out each pot/pan/tupperware from his "safe cabinet" and disperses it around the house after he moves on to the next one after 30 seconds. He also tried to rearrange his Great Auntie Ann and Uncle Micheal's cabinets when we visited them in New Jersey a few months ago..

5) All I Want for Next Christmas is an Extra 1800 Square Feet to Store This Year's Christmas Presents
Since buying my house as a single woman five years ago, I have added 2 dogs, a husband, a cat, a toddler, and a truckload of toys. The biggest space thief--The Jump-o-lene mentioned in the previous blog is 7 feet in diameter and takes up most of my office. However, I have 600 balls to throw at people if they try to disturb me as I work (or blog).

6) The Poo Poo in the Daycare Potty Game
Matthew has been doing #2 regularly on the potty at daycare. He started when he was 13 1/2 months, about a year earlier than average. However, he hasn't done it once for his Mommy or Daddy. I told the pediatrician and she said that he must think of it as a "game" to play at daycare. I guess I will have to wait several months until he will do it for me, but I do appreciate having to buy a lot fewer diapers for daycare.

7) My Daddy is the Funniest Man in the World. So Why isn't my Mommy Laughing?
No one can make Matthew laugh quicker than his Daddy. Matthew seems to think it is the funniest thing when Tony says, "Achoo!" or barks when he turns on the light. This is hardly Comedy Central material. Realizing that my puns and monologues are too sophisticated for a 16 month old, I decided to bark and sneeze for no apparent reason. The silence was deafening. I now know how bad the comedians feel when they tell a joke and get nothing but the sound of crickets in the background. It must have something to do with my delivery.

8) My Quest to Steal Cousin Bodie's Pacifier
Family members seem to think that Matthew and his 3 year old cousin Bodie will be the best of buddies some day. However, this friendship has not started on the right foot. During Thanksgiving, Matthew was mesmerized by the pacifier in Bodie's mouth and would not stop walking towards it and grabbing for it. Of course Bodie pushed Matthew away. Matthew thought it was a game and continued his paci-grabbing. I hope this isn't a precursor to a future of Matthew instigating fights with people much larger than him.

9) Mommy, is it time to go to Gymboree?.. GYMBOREE!
Gymboree Gymboree!! I just love taking Matthew to Gymboree. He has so much fun and it gives me a chance to get out of the house. Gymboree is a gym/playground for toddlers and young kids and we attend classes of singing and playing in a group. Matthew loves the classes and despite the corniness of the games and songs, I love them too. I wish I could get the tune of "The Wheels on the Bus" out of my head.

10) My Creation of the Ultimate Obstacle Course for my Clumsy Daddy.
Matthew likes to leave toys in all areas of the house. Sometimes I pick them up and sometimes I fall way behind in these duties. Of course when I hear Tony shouting expletives after stepping on a toy porcupine or a dump truck, I do what any new mother would do. I yell, "Why don't YOU pick it up!!"